tbf I find being in big fandoms where they just ignore you or tell you how you have ruined their lives worse than being ignored because I wrote something I knew everyone would ignore anyway.

Whereas I have no major problems with being ignored, whatever the reason. (Yes, even though when I post something I do obsessively refresh it looking to see if there are kudos. I embrace my contradictions!) I think it's a weird combination of humility -- "Ah, well, I don't expect that much attention, anyway, who am I, really?" -- and ego -- "People keep writing this wrong and I have to show them how it's done, and it's not my fault if they don't read it because they have no taste!"

And I think most of the times when someone has told me I ruined their life (or words to that effect), it's been a compliment. Like, your fic made me cry and I can't stop thinking about it, you monster! Which just makes me preen and/or laugh evilly. :)

But maybe I've lucked out there.