Life lessons learned from watching Doomwatch

[thisbluespirit]

1. If you discover a plastic-eating virus, don't take it on a plane.

2. Don't breed mutant killer rats or blue moths. It never ends well.

3. Always wear gloves when handling fish.

4. If you're having a paranoid episode, consider moving out of your flat if you live in a tower block. If you're having a paranoid episode and you're an astronaut, don't go up in the rocket.

5. You don't want to be nothing but a brain. No, really.

6. Don't go pot-holing.

7. Always double check that you've told your computer not to kill you today.

8. Take jet-lag seriously and never sit next to a PR guy on the plane.

9. Advertising can kill you. Also, don't take sweets from strangers.

10. Avoid standing in lighthouses when jet planes are flying overhead.

11. Don't judge people by their DNA or any other unproven scientific theory.

12. It's absolutely okay to break into any and all labs/top secret research centres if the people running it won't let you in. They must be up to something, so it doesn't matter that Whitehall and Dr Quist will be cross when you inevitably get caught five minutes later and they have to vouch for you again.

13. Your secretary is not a guinea pig.

14. Don't wear floral shirts and kipper ties when you visit Whitehall. Try something approaching a suit.

15. Scientists are all a lot of weirdies. But don't tell them I told you that.

16. Science and progress are all very well, but human beings are the worst and will ruin everything. Please check your levels of pride, stupidity, arrogance, obsession, corporate greed, and ambition before continuing with your scientific project. Failure to do so will almost certainly be fatal for someone.

Comments

[tardiscompanion]

Wise words, especially about your secretary not being a guinea pig. I can't tell you how many times that ones has gotten me into trouble ;)

[thisbluespirit]

Also guinea pigs can't type. ;-)

[damzel]

I've never seen Doomwatch but this made me laugh (and now I'm intrigued!)

[thisbluespirit]

Ha, good, I'm glad it made you laugh anyway! :-)

It's a very early 1970s show about a government department that investigates new scientific projects to okay them, but obviously the bits we see are the ones where people are being dangerous and irresponsible and nearly ending society as we know it, or just embodying the author's pet hate, depending on how good the script is. But they did try hard with the science and it's actually pretty interesting. But then I like all the beige telly, so I'm no guide anymore!

[damzel]

I think it's more like beige wallpaper with a funky psychedelic pattern, that's actually so retro it's now painfully cool.

*coughs* or something like that.

Given that I'm pretty sure we've got quite similar taste in telly, I'm in no place to judge!

[thisbluespirit]

I think it's more like beige wallpaper with a funky psychedelic pattern, that's actually so retro it's now painfully cool.

LOL, yes - and occasionally, the emphasis really is on the 'painful'!

And we do seem to overlap a fair bit, don't we? :-)

[astrogirl2.livejournal.com]

Hee. These look like useful life lessons. Although some days, I'm not at all sure about #5. And I already knew #15. :)

[thisbluespirit]

:-D

Although some days, I'm not at all sure about #5.

That was Patrick Troughton's problem, but thankfully Dr Quist came around to talk him into dying instead. You'll have to resist the temptation, because I don't think there's a modern Doomwatch around. (And the US branch got scuppered by that darned jet-lag abusing PR guy on the plane anyway!) But it's all fun and games until you realise you're shut in the dark and can barely even communicate anymore and then you have to call it a halt!

(I'm loving the 1970s apocalyptic ALL OUR SCIENCE CAN KILL US, I have to say. Although it does try to remember that progress is good, science is neutral, but human beings are just the worst & there's the snagm for you.)

[astrogirl2.livejournal.com]

Well, I'll be sure to give it enough thought and to make sure I can get some sort of frontal lobe internet connection before I allow anyone to extract my brain. :)

[swordznsorcery.livejournal.com]

That's a lot to remember!

[thisbluespirit]

I'm sure there'll be more before I'm done!

[ragnarok-08.livejournal.com]

Those all sound pretty useful.

[thisbluespirit]

I have sworn off lighthouses for good now, yes. ;-)

[hyarrowen.livejournal.com]

I don't remember 1)- but ahaha OMG.

[thisbluespirit]

#1 was in the first episode. All the plastic melted into goo everywhere. It was glorious. But Robert Powell really shouldn't have taken it out on the plane. It's a wonder he lasted for even that one series! ;-)

[liadt]

There is nothing like a brain, nothing in the world!

Sorry.

So the moral is it's best to go and hide?

[thisbluespirit]

No, no, just be sensible and test things and always programme computers not to kill you and you'll be fine. Unless someone else fails to do so, which they probably will, in which case you won't be, but you might as well not worry because there's not much you can do about it.

:-)

[scripsi.livejournal.com]

*nods* Sounds like good lessons to learn. :)

[thisbluespirit]

I'll say. I'm 100% cured of wanting to breed mutant killer rats!

(also: *sends hugs*)

[scripsi.livejournal.com]

You don't say? ;)

*hugs*

[el-staplador.livejournal.com]

I'll bear those in mind.

I already knew 9. from two separate Wimsey books, though.

[thisbluespirit]

They're very important warnings. *nods*

And, ha, I suppose if I amended #10 to "sound can be fatal in enclosed, tall spaces" you'd have a third covered, too. (I don't remember sweets from strangers, but I've only read them all once, years ago.)

[el-staplador.livejournal.com]

Very end of Strong Poison, for certain values of 'stranger'...

[dimity-blue.livejournal.com]

I'm pretty sure all of those would apply to any sci-fi/apocalypse movie.

Maybe they should stop making films and series about scientists? Apparently, they going to doom us all.

[thisbluespirit]

I think the fish, the lighthouses and the jetlag among other things are fairly unique to Doomwatch!